"The future freaks me out"

Question: Is an event that features both Barry Gibb and Miss Havisham memorable or just downright crazy? This is a query that I tried to answer yesterday.

Last night I attempted my second foray into the wild world of the 31+ Singles scene. There were a few ladies going from my ward, and they invited me to attend with them. As Denise was out of town and I was at a bit of a loss, I acquiesced.

The event was held in Barnwell, and it was an aptly named "Corn Bust". As per usual, I was the youngest one there. Really, I felt like such a fraud while we were all introducing ourselves, and the common descriptive statement was "I have (insert # here) grand-children and (insert # here) great grand-children" (As Andrea says, "Yowsa"!) I did dance twice, both with men over 50, and the one was definitely a septuagenarian if he was a day. He was also the one who, after I told him where I worked, said "You must be good at your job" (with no real further explanation of why he thought that) and pulled me a little closer.

The d.j. was a regular entertainer, with comments and stories enough to choke a horse. He mentioned three times that he had a girlfriend (yeah, yeah, we get it!!) and when she finally showed up, she brought her teenage kids along. The music he played was eclectic, ranging from Bon Jovi's "Have a Nice Day" to Abba's "Take a Chance on Me" to Randy Travis and "Forever and Ever, Amen". Despite the range of music, however, the only dancing that was done was jiving and a slow two-step. I invite you all to picture people trying to jive to Bon Jovi. It will boggle your mind. There was also an ongoing battle between the d.j. (who has a girlfriend, don't you know!) and the "older" folks there. They would ask him to turn down the music, He would, albeit begrudgingly. Then, when the next song came on, the volume would start to rise again. This delightful cycle continued until we left at 10:30.

Now, back to the celebrity and fictional character I have already mentioned. As for Barry Gibb, he was definitely there, hair and beard firmly in place. (Although, sadly, not talking about the issues) I saw a few people try to talk to him, but he only sort of twitched or mumbled. I was really hoping he would favor us with a song, but that wish was not realized. As for Miss Havisham, there was a lady from our ward who was there who I had never really talked to before. She is in her 60's, now single, and as crazy as anything. She started telling us a story that had happened 20 years ago. A man had wanted to marry her, but when she said yes, he married someone else instead. Luckily, it was revealed to her in a series of dreams that she would still be married to him one day. She thinks about it every day, still dreams about him, and although he is still married, it has been revealed that on a specific day next year, they will be wed. I tried to keep an impassive face throughout this story, and I think I succeeded. The rest of the ladies I was with were also keeping up a pretty good front, we all avoided direct eye contact with one another, and waited until she was gone to express our confusion and fear for her well-being.

The announcement for the next activity was that it was going to be held at my new favorite spot, the Magrath Stake Campground. However, everyone was encouraged to bring their great and grand children, so I am thinking that caveat automatically excludes me form an obligation to go.

As much as I joke and mildly exaggerate about the whole experience, I really do feel very out of place and extremely young. I don't think I have to feel guilty for not wanting to go.

Anyway, have a wonderful weekend, one and all.