"You kids can't handle the quiet parts!!"

This week was the opening for "Transformers 2: Revenge of the Fallen" (Duh-duh-duh...)

Will I be seeing this movie in the theater? The answer is no. In case any of you have not heard the story, I fell asleep while watching the first Transformers in the theater...twice. Yes, I fell asleep at the exact same moment in the movie both times - basically as soon as the big action scene is beginning. In my defense, I went to a 10:00 show both times, I am not a guy and therefore was not cheering and crying through the whole movie, and let's be honest, action sequences are too boring for me to pay attention to.

So, because the sequel has even more action, and considering I may have lapsed into a bored-coma during the trailer for Fallen, I will not be in attendance. Well, unless some ridiculously handsome gentleman offers to pay for me, buys me some cola-type beverages, and takes me to the earliest show they have (although, not a matinee, cause afternoon is my sleepy time...I really am an old lady).

You also need to know it isn't just me who thinks this might not be the best movie of the summer; I decided to go for back-up. So, for your enjoyment (or outrage), here are a few reviews of the movie (see The National Post, Wednesday, June 24th, 2009):

"It's like watching a blender for two hours while someone shouts at you. And then the last half hour is the same, except it's more like having your head strapped to a washing machine while you watch a blender and someone shouts at you." -Paul French, FHM

"At once loud and boring, like watching paint dry while getting hit over the head with a frying pan" - Peter Bradshaw, The Guardian

"Go into the kitchen, cue up a male choir singing the music of hell, and get a kid to start banging pots and pans together. Then close your eyes and use your imagination. "
- Roger Ebert, The Chicago Sun-Times