"I don't care what your momma says..."

"...Christmas is almost here!"

So , its my last day of work for 2009!! I should really be doing some paper work, but it will still be here when I get back in January. I have got to have something to do before classes start, and as all of the students are registered, have schedules made, and know where their classes are, there will not be a lot to do on the 4th and the 5th.

We have not been working very hard at all today, mostly having a pretty good YouTube party with Christmas videos, movie trailers and wedding pictures. I am also leaving early today, so I can enjoy the incredibly sunny day!!

This is the first Christmas in 5 years that I will not be working on either the 24th or the 26th of December. I actually get 10 days off and I can not wait. Never mind that I just got back from a week's holiday in Disneyland!!!! I am getting my pictures from Jess and Adam in the next couple of days, and so I will be doing a Disneyland post with pictures, lists, and general wishes that I was still there...

Merry Christmas, everyone!!

About time for a rant

Dear NBC,

I am sorry that because I am a Canadian you think my opinions are irrelevant. Remember how you sent me an email that encouraged me to complete a survey about your programming? I do. Remember when you sent a few more emails which encouraged me even more to express my valued words? I do. Remember how I started the survey and answered several questions only to be "politely" declined because I do not currently live in the U.S.A? Yeah, I do.

You may find this hard to believe, oh great peacock, but there are people outside your country who watch your shows. There are even some in Canada: the rumours are only partly true...our igloos have t.v.s, and some of us even speak English!! We watch "The Office" and "30 Rock". Just so you know, I have stuck with you through some pretty bad times. Remember "Heroes", Season 3? Or, how you pulled the plug on "Scrubs"?

So, the next time I apply for tickets to see one of your shows, check the address I have entered before you send me a hundred emails asking for my input. Or, have the first question on your survey be "Do you live in the U.S.?". Either way, it saves me and you the hassle.

Yours, most sincerely,
Jenny Olsen
Canada

p.s. I really hate "Deal or No Deal".

A hodge-podge

So, I have started to kind of get into Hockey. Well, I am not memorizing players, or buying stupid amounts of paraphernalia, or wearing jerseys, or even watching any games. I am checking the rankings of all the teams every day, and making some friendly predictions about who will win each game that is played. I was right about 4 out of 6 of the games last night - find me a bookie, its time to make some cash!!

Also, for your information, San Jose is #1 in the western division, and New Jersey is leading in the east. (New Jersey!!!)

Last week I had a session with a personal trainer, Kloe, at the gym here at the College. She had done up a program for one of my students, and she is really nice. I signed up, and she developed a program for me to work out. To prepare, I have been doing about 15 minutes of cardio for the 3 weeks. Now, my program is 5 days a week, an hour on Monday, Wednesday and Friday, and 40 minutes on Tuesdays and Thursdays. I did my first hour long yesterday (20 minutes or cardio and 40 minutes of weights and core strengthening). I will tell you that it was ridiculously hard, but I got through it by sheer will and a lot of anger.

I was having a really bad day yesterday, pretty mad about a lot of things. I realized I was a bit out of control after I pulled a Jessica and threw the proverbial glass of apple juice (in the form of a strongly-worded facebook message) into the face of someone else who didn't really deserve my anger that day. (Well, he kind of deserved it). When I went to the gym , I channelled that anger, and after I was done, I had a most relaxing and peaceful evening.

Anyway, along with my gym routine, I have decided to change my eating habits as well, and follow the Canada Food Guide. I think it will be a bit of work at first, figuring out serving sizes, but its not really a diet, more a healthy lifestyle change.

Please wish me strength and will power. Heaven knows I am going to need it.

My case for forgiveness...

I am sorry that I have been away for so long from ye olde blog site. I wish that I had good excuses but, true to me and my laziness, I do not. I do, however, have a few paltry reasons for my absence…please peruse them thoroughly before you judge and hand down a sentence for my crime of neglect.
So, to plead my (somewhat flimsy )case, I will provide a list (are you surprised?) of my justifications.

1. I have been helping to plan the Lethbridge Mid-Singles New Years Eve bash. I have had to rely on a group of people to plan this monstrosity, and what I originally conceived as a classy New Years Eve party has now become a dance. So. Not really where I wanted to go with it. I really just wanted a party where there were lots of activities and people could dance if they wanted to. However, the vision of the elegant evening I wanted to create doesn’t seem to be shared by most. Heaven help them, they only want to dance. It is nice to have help planning an activity, and I just have to sort of wash my hands of the event in the sense that I will gladly not take the credit for an evening that I really wouldn’t have planned if I had my choice.

2. I have been watching “Heroes”. I borrowed the first three seasons from a friend, and I remembered how much I loved, loved, loved season 1. I have gone into a Heroes hibernation, the likes of which have only been seen in such episodes as “The great Scrubs disappearance” or “The day we watched an entire season of Angel”. I will emerge soon enough. I am currently watching season 2, and it is nice to just skip through the parts I don’t really care about. I am only watching it to get to season 3, which I have not seen yet!! So, if you don’t see me, you can just blame it on my deep love for Peter Petrelli and Mohinder Suresh!!

Ok, so the list is pretty short, but there are a few other things that I really don’t want to talk about, and a few that I am keeping under wraps for the time being. Stay tuned, things will hopefully get pretty excited in the next couple of months. In the meantime, I will try my best to keep you updated and entertained.

For those who love a good muffin top!!

Just found this today and I have only one thing to say...

LOVE IT!!

An alternative Poetry Day

I am living in a very interesting type of Hell today. I can not get my high-school grad song out of my head. Now, I am sure that some of you have a few questions, and so I will do my best to address them now.

1. Why, Jenny, do you have that song in your head? Gentle reader, I would give away almost everything I own (excepting my seasons of "Scrubs" and my time-share in the X-files DVDs...I need something to do with my time when I become a shut-in) to know the answer to that question. The song has dug its way into my brain, in true X-file fashion.

2. How is it that, Jenny, you remember your grad song when you graduated almost 15 years ago? Well, I was one of the two very talented members of the threesome who wrote the song (yeah, you read that right!)

3. What is the song like, Jenny? There is only one thing you need to know about this song: It is an absolutely terrible piece of music, and I take a small share of the blame for my participation. The story of how "Next Step to Forever" came to be starts on an evening in my grade twelve year at the Temple Street Chapel where 3 people met to create a song that would represent the class of 1995. The song started out as a pretty terrible instrumental piece by a girl in our grade, and it was to be adapted (lyrics and a melody added) for the grad song. Having no music writing experience, I was not a lot of help with the melody. However, being an amateur poet, I felt myself equal to the task of being a co-librettist.

For your enjoyment and mirth, I am going to give you some sample lyrics of "Next Step to Forever", a song that has been performed only twice. The first was a few selected classmates and myself, accompanied by piano (and, heaven help me, I think organ as well) with the utmost sincerity, in May 1995 at our graduation ceremony. The second performance took place almost 2 years ago, featured only myself and the Concert Mate, and was sung for the pure delight of Denise and Eric Garner.

You will see that the title is Next Step to Forever. There was much debate about which preposition to use, to or is. I personally still wish we would have titled it
Next Step: Forever

Next Step to Forever

Our time has come
and it's like we are one
We've made each step together
Our next step is forever

Our search is on
We must step to where we belong
Stand tall and let them see inside you
And show what we can do

Time will go on for us to dream
may our hearts be ever seen
Let us stand tall with esteem

Love's all around
We must step to where it is found
The best is right here inside you
Your heart will guide what to do

We will be strong as we ca--rry on
We'll meet each day that comes
Our next step is forever.

You're welcome.

Winter wonder

Announcement:




I am doing up Christmas this year...DOING IT UP!! I can't wait to decorate, sing, bake, eat, and generally annoy my roommate and work colleagues with an overload of Christmas cheer. To get all of you excited, here are some Christmas images that are bound to thrill...

Yes, this is a picture of my very favorite Christmas cd. I will be playing it quite regularly, but maybe I will keep it to my car as not to drive Denise too crazy!

O.k., picture number two. I like this one cause that beard is UNBELIEVABLE (I couldn't believe it!!) This is one Santa who looks pretty real. Awesome!

I love this one because Santa and the reindeer are really cool. (How cool are they?) They are so cool that they are wearing sun-glasses and they are doing the awesome poser rap-style fold arms and lean. Yeah.

So, I think that I have saved the best for last. Nothing says Christmas like a bunch of dolls in front of fake food that they wouldn't be able to eat anyway. They do look happy, though.

So, I invite you all to share in my endeavor which I have forth-with dubbed "Christmas Crazy". Unfortunately, at the College, I am not allowed to use the word Christmas which leaves me with two alternatives:

1. Say it anyway and risk offending all and possibly being reprimanded or fired

or

2. Come up with an alternate name like "Season's splendour" or "Holiday hub-bub"

Please let me know which one you think I should do...

Stuff

Here are some things that have been pretty great:



-achieving a perfect smoky eye



-Mint hot-chocolate from Esquires



-hanging out with beavers



-a really great balsamic vinegar from the most unlikely place



-classic-heart-breaking-can't get enough of it-can't stop singing it music



-a long-anticipated beard



-General Conference



-Thanksgiving a week early with a pretty amazing game of Trains!

Poetry Day!!!

For our dear Thursday, I have a poem that I know 2 musical settings for. The text is "I will make you Brooches" by Robert Louis Stevenson. I originally sang one of the settings by Winifred Bury in the Rotary Festival in Cardston!! The other setting is by Vaughn-Williams for his "Songs of Travel". I have only sang this version in my kitchen (quite apropos when you see the lyrics), but I am a bit more partial to it.

Enjoy!!

I Will Make You Brooches

I will make you brooches and toys for your delight
Of bird-song at morning and star-shine at night.
I will make a palace fit for you and me,
Of green days in forests and blue days at sea.

I will make my kitchen, and you shall keep your room,
Where white flows the river and bright blows the broom,
And you shall wash your linen and keep your body white
In rainfall at morning and dewfall at night.

And this shall be for music when no one else is near,
The fine song for singing, the rare song to hear!
That only I remember, that only you admire,
Of the broad road that stretches and the roadside fire.

- Robert Louis Stevenson

Back to retail, back to rage

I realized that since I quit Chapters, I have not had nearly as many rant-type posts. It is not because I didn't like working there (I really did!), but that retail can often bring out the worst in people.

Case in point: last night at Walmart. To give a little back story, while perusing the store during the (allegedly) amazing anniversary sales at Walmart last week, I stumbled upon selected seasons of "The Gilmore Girls" for $13 each. So...considering that Denise and I were at a loss now that we couldn't watch it on t.v. at 4:00 pm every day and we had developed (or in my case re-visited) a bit of an affection/addiction to the Girls, I gladly scooped Season 4 and 5 up and took them home to join our ever-growing family of TV on DVD.

Cut to me, last night. All was well until I tried to watch a few episodes fro disc 4 of Season 5 and realized that the disc wouldn't play at all. After an embarrassing garbage dive, I found the receipt and hightailed it off to my fave late-night hangout with my trusty roommate in tow. When I went to exchange the DVD, I was informed that the store policy for returning things that were originally wrapped in plastic was that if the plastic was removed, they could not be returned...even if they were defective. The girl told me reluctantly that I could exchange it for anything else in the store, but that I couldn't get cash back.

Does anyone see the flaw in the logic here? As much as it would be convenient, defective items are not labelled as such, and especially not outside the plastic. If something is defective, how is that my problem? Why should I essentially have to pay for something that doesn't work? I don't usually get upset while shopping, but I let my displeasure be known with this "policy". It seems absolutely ridiculous! I was lucky that there was another copy available so that I could exchange it, and I only barely restrained myself from asking the Customer Service girl if she could please tell me if disc 4 in this copy would work.

So, the moral is: don't buy DVDs from Walmart unless you are psychic. That, or find a way to get the discs out without removing the plastic.

Wait...maybe I have figured out why the DVD was on sale...

"you've seen how I sparkle when fall nips the air"

I am so excited for the weather!!!

Fall is my favorite season for the following reasons:

-the smell of the change in season...I swear I can actually smell a difference and it is wonderful!
-the clothes which include sweaters! cardigans! jeans! jackets! layers!
-the turning of the leaves...at the College there are actually quite a few trees, and so my drives to and from are so colourful and beautiful
-riding in my car is not the slice of purgatory that it was all summer (black interior+no air-conditioning= an armchair in the waiting-room of Hell)
-the beginning of school which always fills me with a sense of renewal and promise

I know that I am probably going to be nay-sayed on every side, but I love the cooler weather. I am a true Canadian girl, and the heat just makes me cranky and sweaty. In the fall and winter you can always throw on a sweater or jacket (and look amazing!!). In the summer, however, I can only take so many things off without embarrassing myself and/or others.

Thoughts? Arguments? Collective sighs of relief for the reprieve from the desert-like heat?

Comments are always appreciated!

Poetry Day ( with a little bit of jenny for free!!)

I stumbled across a blog today and I found some words of wisdom: "It's ok to wander. It's ok to explore."

These words made me think about how I can often get so caught up in worrying that I am not moving forward in my life, that I am not more "successful". At some point I think we have to realize that it is ok to stop where we are for awhile and look around us. We might meet someone new, we might be able to help someone in a fundamental way, we might be able to take a vacation, we might start seeing ourselves in a different way. We might even learn something valuable about ourselves or someone/something else.

Awhile ago, my Dad told me that instead of moving "up" in his career, he was going to branch out. He started to find different boards/foundations to be a part of. As a result, he started to develop new interests and discover strengths and abilities he didn't know he had.

I have realized that I want to do the same things in my life. I love to be involved in a lot of activities, service opportunities, and jobs: it helps me feel like my life is more fulfilling, I get the chance to meet so many great people, and I can stay busy.

It is so important to be happy where we are in our lives. Sometimes that does mean taking a breath and looking around for awhile. I found one of my favorite poems by Robert Frost today that I think adds something to my thoughts and discussion. I have a special place in my heart for Robert Frost, because I inherited a collection of his poems from my Grandpa after he died. My grandpa loved and wrote poetry, and I have always felt a special bond with him even though I was 12 when he died.

Have a wonderfully happy weekend!


A Time to Talk
by: Robert Frost

When a friend calls to me from the road
And slows his horse to a meaning walk,
I don't stand still and look around
On all the hills I haven't hoed,
And shout from where I am, What is it?
No, not as there is a time to talk.
I thrust my hoe in the mellow ground,
Blade-end up and five feet tall,
And plod: I go up to the stone wall
For a friendly visit.

The sky is falling...

For the delight of everyone working or attending class in the Andrews 2700 wing, there has been massive roof construction going on today. This has included and has not been limited to constant banging, noises that have literally shaken the building, and doors and pathways blocked (different ones every hour so that one feels as though she has taken crazy pills).
There is nothing like a rhythmic banging to aid you in your efforts to come up with personal and professional goals for the upcoming year…

In other news, the heavens seem to be smiling down on all my wonderful friends, and I am beginning to wonder when it will be my turn. While Denise was reunited with someone from the past, and Ashley has suddenly found herself in a regular-type relationship, all I can boast is an awkward side-hug that is probably better left unmentioned, and a strange Pot-luck goer who was a little too attentive for someone I have never met. Sigh. I am about one happy friend away from singing that I “guess I never will be lucky in love” Quel Fromage!

I hope you are all having a wonderful week!

Until next time…

the best Monday in a long time

Hello to you all and a bright-eyed and bushy-tailed welcome from the land of the non-ill. It feels amazing to be able to breathe again...two nostrils, no waiting!! I am actually having a fantastic day thanks to a busy schedule today, a lazy Saturday, a late night pizza session, a "great talk" with a good friend or two, and a beautiful sunny day.

So, not only was Saturday a lazy day, but it was also the first Ashley Flickinger Poetry Exchange extravaganza (she didn't name it that) We met at her house for an evening of poetry reading and delicious drinks. There was a handful of people there and I only knew about 2 of them. I read 3 of my poems,which was an extremely nerve-wracking experience. I think they were well received...there were snaps aplenty, but I think there were also a few people who may have been asleep.

This week looks to go quickly as it is busy and ends with a bang...Stake Conference.

Keep dreaming, everyone!!

The fisherman's friend is more like a frenemy...

I have always liked to compartmentalize my life. (Maybe that is why I can't help liking Don Draper, even if he makes the worst decisions when it comes to women!!!) When I was younger, I didn't like to mix friends and family, so I would rarely invite friends to stay over at my house. I was protective of both parties, and didn't want misunderstandings or confusions. These days, I hate mixing friends from different parts of my life (work, church, etc) because it is often so awkward to bring people together who have nothing but me in common. What should we talk about? Me? Seems a bit egocentric.

Am I a different person with all of those people? If so, is that a bad or a good thing?

Not sure what prompted these musings, probably my swollen glands are pushing my brain into new and strange shapes which, in turn, is provoking some unusual thought activity.

Yes, I am sick - like unto the proverbial dog, and all that. I am 85% sure that I do not have the flu of the pig-people, just a seasonal cold; but I am washing my hands every 2 minutes just in case. (I am a good girl and do what the President tells me!) The result is that my hands are severely chapped (I could probably use some goose grease and a pair of kid gloves right about now) and I am wasting a lot of water and soap. On the upside, I am hopefully not passing on germs to my fellow staff or any of the students. If I had gotten sick just a week before this, I could have stayed home from work, but this week was chock full of beginning of the year commitments. I plan to have a very relaxing Saturday...purely medicinal, of course.

Have a wonderful weekend, everyone!

Pretty much going to ruin your Thursday

Hello party people...and those who are shut-ins (I respect every one's right to socialize or not...according to their will)

I have come to you today to tell some truly horrific news: The Criminal Justice students at the Lethbridge College are no longer required to dress up in professional wear on Mondays.

Wha-a-a-a-a-at?

This information will mean nothing to you if you are one of the following people:
1. Someone who has never attended or been employed by the Lethbridge College, LCC, or any other handle it has been given
2. A personage of the male persuasion (unless you are the type who does enjoy the sight of a clean-cut man-boy in a suit and tie)
3. A heartless and obviously blind female.

I am 32 years old, but I enjoyed the sight of a veritable sea of youngish men in suits as much as my 20 year old self did. It really brightens up a Monday. Honestly, sometimes it was the only thing getting me to work after the weekend.

So, now it is back to a "case of the Mondays" for me every week. Sigh.

Anyway, to cheer you all up, I have found a poem that I wrote about 2 years ago to the month. You will be happy to know that this one does not have a story from my life behind it...merely musings. When you read it, please allow me the privilege of misusing a comma and inventing a word. It is poetry, after all!!

September 2007

This is how my heart breaks:
one awkward regret at a time.

Oh, I had visions
of different scenes-
ribbons of eloquence
that would stretch out to
bring you back
when my beautiful words
(my perfect words)
had made you understand

But.
those shiny bands
(who can tell how strong?)
were severed by my ineloquence
and your silence.

JKO

Smoking never loooked so good...

O.k., wow.

Denise and I are hopelessly addicted to a little series called"Mad Men" that airs on AMC Sunday nights. I will be the first to say that the show is a little bit racy; however, with a main character that looks like Don Draper, and with the costumes and overall design of the show (which is set in the 1960's), we can't seem to get enough.

Did I mention that we love Jon Hamm as Don Draper?

In the spirit of my love for the show, here are a few other things I am crazy about right now:

Reading

Grey shoes

lentils

chocolate lava cakes with fresh raspberry coulis

my white sunglasses

The Office

Ciao!!

For L.

If she taught me one thing,
It is this:

Know what you want and never
Settle for less.

This is it:
I wonder if she wanted to go?

This one goes out to all the bois, and Rachel of course...

Here is something from "The National Post", Saturday Aug. 8th:

"Corinne Maier, mother of two, has some advice for would-be parents: Don't. Resist the societal pressure to procreate, she argues in a witty manifesto against parenthood called No Kids, 40 Good Reasons Not To Have Children. "This little book is intended to further discourage those potential parents everywhere who are beginning to wonder if having children is really worth the trouble," she says, adding that children will kill your desires, transform you into slaves and, inevitably, disappoint you. The book caused an uproar when it was released in her native France, a country that boasts a baby boom."

There has been a lot of response/backlash about this book in the Post, and all over the internet.
Here is one of the responses by a columnist from today's edition of "The National Post". It gave me hope that there are still people of optimism and faith in the world.

"The future freaks me out"

Question: Is an event that features both Barry Gibb and Miss Havisham memorable or just downright crazy? This is a query that I tried to answer yesterday.

Last night I attempted my second foray into the wild world of the 31+ Singles scene. There were a few ladies going from my ward, and they invited me to attend with them. As Denise was out of town and I was at a bit of a loss, I acquiesced.

The event was held in Barnwell, and it was an aptly named "Corn Bust". As per usual, I was the youngest one there. Really, I felt like such a fraud while we were all introducing ourselves, and the common descriptive statement was "I have (insert # here) grand-children and (insert # here) great grand-children" (As Andrea says, "Yowsa"!) I did dance twice, both with men over 50, and the one was definitely a septuagenarian if he was a day. He was also the one who, after I told him where I worked, said "You must be good at your job" (with no real further explanation of why he thought that) and pulled me a little closer.

The d.j. was a regular entertainer, with comments and stories enough to choke a horse. He mentioned three times that he had a girlfriend (yeah, yeah, we get it!!) and when she finally showed up, she brought her teenage kids along. The music he played was eclectic, ranging from Bon Jovi's "Have a Nice Day" to Abba's "Take a Chance on Me" to Randy Travis and "Forever and Ever, Amen". Despite the range of music, however, the only dancing that was done was jiving and a slow two-step. I invite you all to picture people trying to jive to Bon Jovi. It will boggle your mind. There was also an ongoing battle between the d.j. (who has a girlfriend, don't you know!) and the "older" folks there. They would ask him to turn down the music, He would, albeit begrudgingly. Then, when the next song came on, the volume would start to rise again. This delightful cycle continued until we left at 10:30.

Now, back to the celebrity and fictional character I have already mentioned. As for Barry Gibb, he was definitely there, hair and beard firmly in place. (Although, sadly, not talking about the issues) I saw a few people try to talk to him, but he only sort of twitched or mumbled. I was really hoping he would favor us with a song, but that wish was not realized. As for Miss Havisham, there was a lady from our ward who was there who I had never really talked to before. She is in her 60's, now single, and as crazy as anything. She started telling us a story that had happened 20 years ago. A man had wanted to marry her, but when she said yes, he married someone else instead. Luckily, it was revealed to her in a series of dreams that she would still be married to him one day. She thinks about it every day, still dreams about him, and although he is still married, it has been revealed that on a specific day next year, they will be wed. I tried to keep an impassive face throughout this story, and I think I succeeded. The rest of the ladies I was with were also keeping up a pretty good front, we all avoided direct eye contact with one another, and waited until she was gone to express our confusion and fear for her well-being.

The announcement for the next activity was that it was going to be held at my new favorite spot, the Magrath Stake Campground. However, everyone was encouraged to bring their great and grand children, so I am thinking that caveat automatically excludes me form an obligation to go.

As much as I joke and mildly exaggerate about the whole experience, I really do feel very out of place and extremely young. I don't think I have to feel guilty for not wanting to go.

Anyway, have a wonderful weekend, one and all.